Expressing a little dissent

November 28th, 2007

Instead of trying to offer a considered and thoughtful analysis that ultimately treads on the same path others have already expertly walked (Broken Toys, GameGirlAdvance, No Cookies for Me, Shrub.com, FeministGamers, and many others), I figured I would instead offer a personal reaction to the Jade Raymond fiasco.

Put simply, I’m angry, ashamed, and depressed. Why is it that the same male gamers who long to have more women join the ranks of gamers feel entitled to gawk and grab? It seems that some core of what we define as “gamers” has built an exclusive, unwelcoming community where the simple social norms of courtesy don’t apply. They use “rape” to mean “beat in a game” and consider “gay” and “girl” acceptable insults. They act like rutting goats when someone reveals herself to be a real-life woman in a game, then hoot in derision when she leaves. They insist that no female gamer can possibly be physically attractive, insist that attractiveness is the most important characteristic a woman (gamer or not) can have, then deride female gamers (skilled or unskilled) for lack of ability.

Does it sound like I’m “male bashing”? I’m not. I’m bashing assholes. When I was a kid, we watched Free to Be You and Me (which I now watch with my daughter). I honestly believed the world was changing and would continue to change. I thought everyone wanted a world with fewer assholes.

Now I see the “boys will be boys” attitude broadly accepted.

I don’t blame men for this. I don’t blame women. I blame our culture itself (as practiced by both men and women). Look, I know feminism is hard. Even people who aren’t afraid of the word “feminism” struggle to realize their ideals. I know too many people of my generation who have given up the dream of self-actualization and equality. And look at how gender is treated TV today.

So it’s not just gamers. This rot is everywhere.

But it’s pretty bad in “gaming culture.” The anonymity of online gaming, the historically male base, the weird connection between machismo and competition (a fundamental aspect of games)—these have given birth to a core in which sexism and hostility aren’t just endemic, they’re sometimes lauded and often defended!

I’ve heard some people call for thicker skins or appeal to the right to free speech. Well, I’m actually a big fan of humor. I believe anything—yes anything—can legitimately be the subject of humor. I believe, too, that anyone has a right to express any idea in just about any form.

What bugs me here is our culture (our modern culture, the heavily American Internet culture, the gaming culture). If you want to be an asshole, you have every right to do so. But those of us bothered by this sort of thing have a duty, despite the fact that the prevailing culture doesn’t seem to agree, to express our dissent.

Entry Filed under: Gender, Popular Perception, Problems